Dayna Sykes 2/27/19 Dayna Sykes 2/27/19

Information about Depression and Your T(w)een

Statistics

Did you know that only 30% of Teens and Tweens who are depressed are actually getting treatment?

Did you also know that Teen Depression continues to rise every single year?

Each day in our nation, there are an average of over 3,041 attempts by young people grades 9-12.

AND 4 out of 5 teens who attempt suicide have given clear warning signs!

With depression on the rise that means the Teen Suicide rate is on the rise.

Many teens do not get treatment until they become actively suicidal. This means they are making comments to someone about their thoughts and plans to kill themselves, or they have already made an unsuccessful attempt to suicide aka take their own life before their parents seek treatment.

How Do we Stop This Trend?

Become more knowledgeable about depression in our teens and tweens and create less Stigma around getting treatment!!!!

Start Here

Complete this survey (it's very quick) to help me understand what you need more information about.

From your answers, I will gather information to create more education for YOU.

Take The Survey

I will be able to provide future workshops to present in our community and resources to better help you and your Teens/Tweens.

You can also LEAVE A COMMENT and ask any questions you may have about Depression.

ALSO…

There are only 3 Spots open in my Teen Girls Group. Click Here to sign your teen up!

AND IN CASE YOU HAVEN’T ALREADY

Click Here to receive my free email series on Connecting with Your Teen.

Thanks for your help!

Talk to you soon,

Dayna

Dayna 10/5/18 Dayna 10/5/18

Avoidance Causes You To Miss Out!

Do you ever avoid situations or people because it’s too stressful or painful to be in that experience? Avoidance is a natural human defense mechanism, but sometimes it can be detrimental to our own growth and happiness.

Today, I was walking through our freshly cut hay-field to get a message to my husband and father-in-law. While talking to a family friend who was present, I said “I love the smell of fresh cut hay, but it does not love me.” I knew for even the maybe 5 minutes I was standing there, I was going to have some discomfort. As I walked away, I noticed itching in my legs. Then while driving away, I could feel a little discomfort in my breathing.

You see, I am a very allergic person. But I live in the country where I am exposed to all things I am allergic too. Now, I could move (but I’m pretty sure I’d have to leave my husband behind), but staying here is more beneficial to me than avoiding.

Not to mention how BEAUTIFUL it is where I live!

So what is an allergic country girl to do?

Be Aware…

If you know situations cause you discomfort (maybe it’s not an allergy but more depression, anxiety, post traumatic stress, panic), be aware of those triggers. I am aware of what triggers my allergies and am prepared for the consequences of being around them.

Find the Win…

For me, I was able to see God’s beauty in this hayfield. I took a beautiful picture of it. Being outdoors is so inspiring and calming to me. It’s worth it to have the experience!

Have a Plan…

So let’s say you are going to be around family that triggers your depression or anxiety… If it’s not an unhealthy relationship, and you want a connection with that person, then have a plan of how you will combat the negative reactions your body will likely experience.

Know your limits and have a plan of escape.

When I am around certain people from my past who tend to cause difficulty for me, I make sure I visit them instead of them visiting me. This way I can leave when I’m ready instead of having them in my home wishing they would leave already and not wanting to ask them to leave.

Initiate a calming activity

If your reaction is anxiety or panic, make sure you have a go-to method for calming your body and mind.

Sometimes avoidance is good when it’s too overwhelming for you to manage. But just remember, avoidance can become a very unhealthy way to cope, and you will miss out on some great life experiences and connections.

Need some assistance in creating your plan?

Click Here to Download a Free Worksheet!

Then, comment below and share with me how avoidance affects your life!

Looking forward to hearing from you,

Dayna Sykes

Licensed Child & Teen Therapist

Gordonsville Counseling & Play Therapy

P.S. If you have a teen girl who struggles with avoidance and you’ve tried everything to help her break out of this, then Empowering Teen Girls Group may be just what she needs to build her confidence, boost her ability to cope with difficult situations, and learn to connect with others in the process.

P.P.S Do you tend to walk on eggshells around your teen and avoid her throughout the day? Every effort you make causes her to lash out and become angry. Sign up for my free email course, “Learn to Connect Better with Your Teen”, and get 5 days of action steps you can take to better support and connect with your teen. Just Click Here!

Dayna 9/27/18 Dayna 9/27/18

3 Steps to Get Unstuck

Learn 3 steps to free yourself from feeling stuck in your circumstances.

Feeling stuck in an experience or situation can make you feel "terrified" to quote one of the teens in my group. It's a feeling that everyone experiences and because we usually don't share this feeling, it's hard to break free. Experiences can include:

Having a job you hate

Struggling with a class you may fail

Going through separation/divorce

Losing your job

Financial Stress

Living in chaos

Fighting and arguing with a family member or friend

Here are 3 Tips to get you UNSTUCK!

Assess how you feel

Sometimes we try to avoid our feelings because they are uncomfortable and we ignore them. That's how we get stuck feeling depressed and anxious. We try so hard to ignore it or avoid discomfort that it never goes away. Take some time to feel this feeling and assess what is causing it. But don't sit in it all day. Become aware of it and then go to the next step.

2. Change your focus

When we focus on pain for a long period of time, the pain becomes worse. Think about a dull headache you have. Sometimes you can be busy and you don't notice the headache anymore, but when someone asks you about it, there it is again. If you focus on the pain, it becomes more noticeable and even worse. So take the focus off of the stuck feeling. Don't sit around and think about it for hours or days. Find something else to do with your time. You don't want to be stuck in an endless cycle of depression or sadness. That will keep you from functioning. If you are struggling to function, try some grounding techniques.

3. Take Action

Figure out what you can take control of in your situation.

If you are living in a chaotic environment, visualize how you want your home to be and then take action steps to get there. If you are in a job you hate, set some goals and work your way out of that job. Change is hard, but change is what helps us grow and reach our goals in our lives.

One way I am learning to reach my own personal goals is to "Do it scared!" If we feel stuck because we are afraid of the outcome, we may stay stuck forever. I for one do not like that feeling.

In our group yesterday, we discussed consequences of taking action. One question I posed in group this week was "If you do _____ or say_____ will you die?" So what if you make a mistake! Life is about learning from mistakes.

What are you waiting for? Take these Steps and get out of that glue that is keeping you stuck!

If you need some more encouragement, comment below and let me know what's keeping you stuck.